Take This Job and Love It: Lumberjill 

On “Take This Job and Love It” our reporters do everything they can not to get chopped, but in this edition Chelsey Anderson was trying to make a cut and more at the Maine Lumberjack Show in Trenton.—————–Timber Tina: “It’s kind of fun though!” Chelsey: “I bet.” Timber Tina: “It’s exciting!”Timber Tina is head lumberjill and owner of the Maine Lumberjack Show in Trenton. We started the day with speed climbing, and before I’m even finished suiting up I become concerned about the muscle mass I lack for this event.Chelsey: “There’s not a hole there.” Timber Tina: “There’s not a hole there!? Evidently the guys have bigger calves.” Timber Tina: “Alright. Now what you’re supposed to do is go step, step, throw. Step, step, throw. So it’s one and two.” Chelsey: “Except those step steps are on this?” Timber Tina: “It’s on the tree.”Timber Tina: “Just dig one spur in.”Timber Tina: “And now dig another one in.” Chelsey: “Oh no! Okay. Gosh. I’m going to come crashing down.”Chelsey: “So how high up do most of these people go? All the way to the top?” Timber Tina: “Higher than you!” Chelsey: “Yes!” Timber Tina: “We tell them if they go to the top of the line and here’s the line Chelsey. Right here.” (laughter)Well everyone has to have a goal. Timber Tina: “There you are!” “Yeah!” Next up, cross cut sawing.Timber Tina: “Rule number one in sawing, Chelsey, never let the saw touch you!”Since I was most certainly not a competitive sawer I found little accomplishments along the way.Timber Tina: “Alright. Next, chain sawing!”Timber Tina: “Hands on the top of the log. Competitors ready! Three, two, one, go!”Timber Tina: “Okay so now you broke the decompression.”It took me another try to get it right.Timber Tina: “Now in ax throwing we throw at 20 feet and we throw at this target over here.”Timber Tina: “Basically you are going to have the ax in your hand and you bring it back once and then throw it.”Here goes nothing. Literally.Chelsey: (grunt) “It was close.” “It’s not horseshoes!”Another try gets me to the target at least.Timber Tina: “You got some pipes on you girl. But when you double stick it’s a DQ.”Chelsey: (grunt) “I did it again.” Timber Tina: “I can’t believe you are hitting it though. That’s awesome!”Timber Tina: “Well, you’re tilling the soil for next year.”Some advice?Timber Tina: “Become one with the ax.”I must have been listening.Chelsey: “Oh my word!” (applause) Timber Tina: “Oh my gosh.”On that note I moved on to chopping. While Tina marks the log and cuts my food holds, I get safety gear on.Timber Tina: “Three, two, one, go.”This was going to take me a lot longer than the lumberjills. Timber Tina: “Don’t hire her to build you a log cabin.”30 minutes later.Timber Tina: “I’m going to go get a coffee.”And some help from Timber Tina.Chelsey: “It’s wobbling. Hit it hard. Hit it harder. HIT IT!” (grunts) “Am I going to fall on my ax?”Not quite.Chelsey: “Look at that! Wounds.” Timber Tina: “Oh my gosh, she’s got a blister.”My final job. Logrolling. Tina showed me how it was done before I got started.Timber Tina: “Pitter patter. I’m going to let go now. You’re all on your own. Oh my gosh! Look at how good you are! Patter, patter, patter.” Chelsey: “AH!”Timber Tina: “You can get on the log here if you want.”Me a trusting soul.Chelsey: “AH! Brr! Cold. Oh! Is my makeup okay?”Timber Tina: “I’m going to have to put log rolling as your best so far.”Chelsey: “So the real question is, would I be hired at your show?” Timber Tina: “You would be hired, because you’ve given a brilliant effort. No you’re great! Congratulations!” Chelsey: “Thank you.” Timber Tina: “You’re hired.”——————We’re not sure if it was a sign from God, but on the way back to the station a car pulled in front of our WABI vehicle with the license plate “U R FYRD”So Chelsey’s staying with TV for now.Chelsey would like to thank Timber Tina for the experience. She has a greater respect for every woodsman and gal out there.If you have an idea for our next Take This Job and Love It, e-mail us: [email protected]